I was amazed in class when Brother Williams brought out a book called "Encouraging Heterosexuality", but at the same time I wasn't surprised because of the current debate against and between Homo and Heterosexual relationships. I've been able to read a lot of interesting articles and listen to some great remarks done by various professors, and the most common question is this: is same sex attraction something people are born with?
A study was done that examined the differences between people’s brains who declared to be either homo or heterosexual. The discovery was made that there are small differences between the both, but that there was no clear evidence that supported an actual structure difference in the two. Activists who were for homosexuality ran with the study saying that this supported the fact that same sex attraction is something you are born with, when the study proved no such thing. That is a total misconception.
I’m lead to believe that it is a choice we make to be hetero or homo sexual. When we are born as infants and grow into little children we have no idea the difference between the two. So what makes people think this way? First of all to point out, we expect when kids are little that boys should engage in boyish activities, like playing with trucks, action figures, being tough as they grow up, liking sports, etc. Girls on the other hand we expect to be more sensitive, gentile, creative, playing with dolls and dressing up, etc. When as a little child a boy shows more creative, sensitive tendencies, we automatically put a label on them that they must be gay when they’re just showing different qualities. Same thing when a girl acts more like a tom boy, we label that as automatically being a lesbian. One question is has our focus increased homosexuality? This labeling from parents, peers, and others around us is misunderstanding with bad consequences. They think to themselves that they don’t fit in with their own sex and jump to the conclusion that they’re gay or lesbian. People who are sexually abused during their lives or molested could also think about the possibility that they have same sex attraction because of how others have mistreated them.
I lived in California during Prop 8, it was a really rough time when perfectly good friendships were severed, people were hurt, property vandalized, and many other things. I’m LDS, and there were many people under the misconception that Mormons were anti-gay. It was said by the First Presidency that we’re not anti-anyone, we are Pro-family. We don’t hate anyone like we were accused of during that time; we just wanted the word marriage to remain man and wife under law.
So how do we encourage heterosexuality? The question is how much choice is involved, and many people think it’s something they can’t change but we determined in class that it’s a process that can be overcome if they desire. Heavenly Father has in mind specific male and female roles so that we can have successful functioning families.
Parents can teach proper roles/principals and promises; demonstrate healthy marriage, and be accepting of interests, find strengths of each other and their children. Encourage friendships, protect from sexual abuse, and no matter what your child or sibling chooses, love your son or daughter, sister or brother no matter what choices they make. That the best thing anyone can do. Of course doing these things won’t stop people from struggling with same sex attraction, but it can teach correct principals. Many failed hetero relationships lead to homo relationships and in many cases the individual never saw a successful marriage between a man and woman.
We live in a society that focuses on passion, and whatever makes a person feel good is what we believe we should go with. Some think that in order to be happy in a relationship we need someone who’s just like us. Girls or guys will wonder to themselves why their heterosexual relationship isn’t working, and then turn to the same sex for happiness. But if we truly live gospel in our lives we will really be able to have a successful, happy, heterosexual relationship. Because of misunderstandings we really set ourselves up for disappointment.
These are my ideas and opinions, and because this is such a touchy subject, I don’t intend or hope to offend anyone with any of the info above.
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